is a single mama in the city, super-savvy editor, writer, video host and shameless shoe whore.
Where I suddenly realize the next freaking stop's Christmas
Monday, December 17, 2007 Looking at the week ahead on my calendar, makes me wiggy. I see all of the scribbled out commitments -- Lil E's co-op Christmas program (no diplomatic "holiday" assembly here, people, this is all Jesus, pre-birthday), a party of my own, a family caroling get-together, a winter solstice service, seeing Santa, lining up against the windows in front of Marshall Field's Macy's, getting out cards, deadlines galore. Oh, and did I mention that I've officially purchased two whole gifts so far? So...wiggy.
And then there are all the friends I haven't seen in ages, the lovely little holiday goodness of baking and decorating and delivering treats to friends and neighbors, taking the time to just stop, sit down and stare into the lights on the tree. I need all of those things right now, perhaps more than any other year, and all I've seen is that list of things to do.
As my mom says, even in the most challenging years, the holidays will come. Even when the list is long and the commitments are many and the holiday comes at your family like a freight train, it comes. And then, there you are in your pajamas with coffee, watching the small child frantically tear into wrapping paper or laughing as he apathetically steps past an unopened toy you labored over for weeks. There it is, right in your living room, and there you are, in the middle of it no matter what you've checked off or has yet to be completed.
Christmas is a week away, no matter how much denial or how in over my head I am. One week away and I will be in it, no matter what. So today, one piece of that list at a time, I will make my way toward it. And I will try try try to stop the train and stare into the lights for just a minute each day until all the lovely parts are laying contentedly among the bows and shredded paper and it is all already done.
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