Motherlode-a-Go-Go

I know you are so going to get this: I am wiped out.

I am invigorated, inspired and all kinds of geared up to get out there and tap into my inner activist (who am I kidding? The Sharpies are always on hand.) on behalf of women, and specifically, mothers. I am also right back to my caffeine dependency this week (who am I kidding? Last week too. And the week before that. And so on and so on).

I thought that once I was back from The Motherlode conference, I would be able to really tackle that ginormous to-do list. So far, very little of it has been touched, let alone tackled. Since I know many of you get this all too well, I know you will be just fine with me shamelessly linking to my rundown of my adventures in Toronto (and getting out of it) here rather than racking my brain to rehash. I do have enough energy to fill up my Amazon shopping cart, though, and so I’m off to order some new reading for my night stand.

 
Until the coffee really kicks in (or we’re through the dreaded Daylight Savings schedule effer for parents of children who can’t read a clock yet), I’ll see you on the flip site.

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Fully Motherloded

Pardon me, grrrlfriends. I had all kinds of good intentions while I was at the Motherlode. I was going to post reports on who I met, what I saw, what I was learning. I wanted to make you feel like you were there.

But then, as conferences often go, I found myself at the end of the day exhausted and over-caffeinated, with a brain on fast forward, a pile of doodled and illegible notes, loads of email to sort through and in dire need of some cuddle time with Bruce and Lil E. I packed in all in and promised myself to post it all once I returned home to Chicago. But as road trips with toddlers often go, the 8 hour drive home became a 13 hour drive, including 2 hours just to get out of Toronto. Just when I was thinking a particular block of Yonge Street looked strikingly like Times Square, those crazy Canadians shut down an entire expressway. Not just a lane or a few exits or stretch of downtown. The whole thing.

We were left with no other choice but to sit among thousands of other cars, stocked up on snacks and squabbling over the map. The good part is I now have a much better idea of how Bruce and I would be on Amazing Race (which is a little less Cho Bros -woohoo- and a little more Rob and Kimberly -ugh- than I previously pretended).

Getting home felt wonderful (and getting home without a second immigration interview, even better). No matter how nice a hotel is, it always feels good to crawl into your own bed, under your own covers.

What I always forget, however, is that getting home isn’t the end of the road trip. There are days to recuperate, schedules to try to recover, more email, more exhaustion and over-caffeination. Throw a birthday party, Halloween and my turn to be Parent of the Day at co-op into the mix, and well…posting just falls lower and lower on the to-do list.

 
Now that you are probably as weary as I am, I will skip over the many details of the many conversations and sessions that I participated in and how I am all kinds of geared up to join other mothers in changing the world. Immediately. Right now. Today. Or at least after I finish this reheated cup of coffee.

 
Here are a few (just a few) people you should read/find online/get to know. These women have some incredible work in progress and are publishing/researching/speaking/mobilizing/blogging/writing/acting out to empower women and give mamas more voice in the world:

Andi Buchanan of Literary Mama and many other endeavors. Do remember when I waxed obsessive over her books and blog? I had one of those eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee moments when I worked up the nerve to meet her. (Did I really say, “I need to meet you. I love your work. I love you.”?). Check out the salons she’s been hosting on MotherTalk and the blog tours she’s organized for women to read and review books. Talking with her for a few minutes was like checking in with an old grrrlfriend, and that a small and significant thrill for newbie me.

 
Amy Tiemann of  Mojo Mom. This is a site and blog I’m loving these days. Through Mojo Mom, Amy’s mission is to “provide support and inspiration to help each woman answer the question, Who am I, now that I am a Mom?”  She recognizes the journey into motherhood as a transformative and creative opportunity for self-discovery. How much do all mamas need some support for that?

 
Ann Douglas, an author who has written profusely on parenting and pregnancy. I thought her witty presentation on the study of pregnancy and parenting books spanning the last century was not just a good perspective on information for new mamas, but good fun and good poke at how much we invest in all that advice.

 
Ann Crittenden, the author of If You’ve Raised Kids, You Can Manage Anything. She is an economist journalist and feminist who did a study comparing baby and parenting books to business management rhetoric. She found that the language and message of how to be a good CEO and how to be a good parent were nearly identical. She was fascinating and a great storyteller. I can't wait to read this book. Honestly, if I could, I would buy each of you a copy of her book just based on the keynote she gave. But since all of my paycheck seems to have ended up in Canadian loonies, well...I'll just recommend you add it to your holiday gift list.

Andrea Doucet, author of recently-released Do Men Mother? Fatherhood, Care, and Domestic Responsibility She presents a very interesting look at men as primary caregivers and the concept of men mothering children. Her concepts include single parent fathers, primary caregiver fathers and gay fathers. Somewhat controversial, even in the side convos I caught bits of at the conference, and very interesting to think about mothering as a verb and relationship rather than a biological construct.

Black Woman and Child, a magazine “provides pregnancy and parenting information strongly rooted in African culture.” I picked up a couple of copies and was immediately engaged. This is a mag that seems to be quickly gaining momentum.

 
Judith Stadtman Tucker of Mothers Movement Online. I had a little silent squeal of delight when I spoke with her for a few minutes following a panel. Wow. Her analysis of women’s comments on message boards and blogs and the difference in language of choice and change was so. right. on.

I missed out on the big blogging panel (boo boo triple boo) because my presentation was shuffled into another session in the next room. I was disappointed to miss out on this gathering and the insights of other mother bloggers. I’ll keep at it, though. I am determined to be on one of those kickass panels one day. In the meantime, I will do my very best to fight past the caffeine crashes and mounds of unpacked suitcases to post my way to that panel participation.

Photo credit: Around the world by Jenny W. / www.sxc.hu

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REESE!

More on the Motherlode later. For now, I had to jump in with utter shock at news of Reese and Ryan's break-up, which you can check out here, here and here.  Isn't it a bummer when one of those "good" Hollywood pairs puts an end to things? Isn't it sadder when you are totally invested in a celebrity couple staying together? The scars from Jen and Brad have barely healed, people.

It probably won't shock you that Reese is definitely on the Grrrl of the Week list. Loved her as June Carter Cash in Walk the Line. Loved her in Pleasantville, Election and Legally Blondes (both of them). Mostly, I loved hearing her talk about how she's addicted to her crock pot on Ellen.  She's invested in playing smart roles and that scores high on the love list, too.  And while babies seem to be the hottest accessory a celebrity can have (oh wait, maybe that's a pregnant belly, but anyway...), it is strange how often we see those same celebrities sans infants.  I appreciate that the paparazzi mostly catches Reese with her kiddos, and even more that the pics are often of her grabbing up take-out. (Dude, what is it with me and Reese and her eating habits? I'm freaking myself out here).

So Reese, if you are reading (a People reader can dream, right?), bring the kids over and we'll have some heart-to-heart over slow-cooked chicken and dumplings and then hit the hood for trick or treating. It'll all be OK, your grrrlfriend's right here for you, honey.

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