Sassy Single Mom Style: Favorite spring-to-summer tops

Sassy Single Mom is a new feature to help mamas, especially those doing raising kids all or mostly alone, to feel good, look fabulous and be mindful of budget -- because sometimes a killer pair of wedge heels, some good-ass jeans, a scrumptious snack or quick tip on how to get more sleep can take you from surviving to sashaying.

Here in Chicago, we jump from wooly-sweatered May days to spaghetti-strapped summer days. There's not lots of in between. On one gorgeous, 80-degree break from the rain and muck last week, I embraced all the happiness of summer by purchasing a few new tops that I can layer under little jackets and floaty cardigans now and strip down to when the temperature gets back to a happy place (hopefully, soon).

The Steal

First, I purchased this little henley tee from Old Navy. I'm picky about their clothes, simply because I've found some inconsistencies in sizing and durability in the past. But once I realized this top fit me in a small, I put all that aside (what size inconsistencies?). It's a gauzy, soft cotton but not too clingy. I love the way it lays, perfectly framing a big, chunky necklace or tucking under another layer without being bulky or obtrusive. I chose a crisp white color (here, it's shown in Palomino, which is six dollars cheaper on sale -- score!) and paired it with dark jeans and my red, red shoes. I'll be wearing it with little skirts and, if I'm feeling brave, tie shorts this summer. It's $14.94, and I may be going back for the same style in a few more colors.

A Bit More Spendy

I love that there are sequins dotting bags, espadrilles, and even cardigans for spring and summer. I'm also not afraid to totally overdo it when it comes to shine, which is why I am wearing my gold petal-sequin tank more now than when I got it about a year-and-a-half ago. Mine is from LOFT but this one is almost identical. From Calvin Klein, it comes in the loveliest soft pink and this strangely named olivine for $79. Do a little search to find one that best fits your curves, budget and hot date-lifestyle. I'm wearing mine these days with a skinny red patent belt and (oh yes, again) my red patent shoes, topped with the cropped brown leather jacket I got at the same time. The belt fits at the hip so there's a bit more shape to the tank but I'm not afraid to rock it with some tight old jeans for that effect either.

An Investment

I really wish this photo did this silk dolman-sleeve top justice. From CAbi - the Tupperware-party way to sell a line of clothes to wine-drinking ladies running around in their bras and skinny jeans like it's 1995 during sorority rush week -- this Gypsy top is $118. But I have to tell you, loves, it looks fabulous on, draping the girls just so and tucking in at the hips so that no suck-in, Spanx-like tanks are required. It's more than I'd normally spend on a top, but given the shiraz-a-flowin', it's a good thing my credit card left in the shape it did. I'll be dressing this up for a night out to dinner and pairing it with jeans (oooh, maybe even the daring white ones) and heels for days when I want to step up the jeggings uniform.

What sassy little tops are you loving this spring?

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A beautiful way to start the week

Mondays always seem to be the days when I most need a moment, just one small moment, of perfect calm. Perhaps it is diving into a new week's full schedule, perhaps I let myself stay up too late or not exercise or be alone nearly enough. Perhaps it is the energy of all the people in cars around me or at work or in my building or very own home, frantically trying to catch up from a Friday afternoon that was sloughed off early. Whatever it is, this is what brought 3 minutes and 5 seconds of soul soothing this morning.

Many thanks to Gabrielle for sharing it on Design Mom, another pocket of quiet delight I like to visit on mornings when the world and my brain already seem to be spinning too fast.

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What Mother's Day really looks like

  It was a simple day.

Lil E woke up too early, rushed in to ask me if he could give me his gift right now! He snuggled up to me touching every little present before I could, so delighted with each tiny treasure he chose. Inside a beautiful, brightly embroidered cosmetic bag, there was a purple and pink barrette, lip balm that smells like cake, a love-note pad and -- his favorite -- a tiny pink seal eraser.

I pulled my hair back, fastened it with the sparkling barrette and asked what he thought.

"BEAUTIFUL!" he said. I had to have been shining brighter than the rhinestones in my hair.

We were late to church school and I had no idea his class was singing in front of the congregation, but LIl E rolled with it. He doesn't always roll with it. But here, at our church, he is fine with whatever comes. That, and the kid loves to be on stage. Even if he is simply moving his mouth open and shut around a wide grin without singing or knowing a single word. Which is what he did.

He brought me a marigold planted in a styrofoam coffee cup. I left him eat two desserts at coffee hour.

Then we took my mom to lunch, where he took pictures of us with the beautiful, oversize-budded roses given to every mother at a table. Lil E wanted one so badly he didn't even smile when I said he could have one -- as soon as he gave birth.

(He took shots of us that included our whole faces, but I liked the light and our smiles in this one best.)

But I let play a game that depletes every drop of juice from my phone, the pasta came and he completely forgot about being without a flower.

(Lil E took this one, too.)

We napped. For 2-1/2 blissful hours. And even better, when we woke up, it was still sunny outside and just enough warmth remained to take a walk in our neighborhood.

We looked at all the flowers blooming in neighbor's yards, marveled over our favorites -- tulips, violets, magnolia trees, dandelions.

He held my hand even after we we'd safely crossed streets.

It wasn't a perfect day. He reminded me of that in the tub, covered in a bubble beard and mustache, and apologized for having such a hard time listening to me today. It had edged all these wonderful moments, but it was over.

Then bedtime. We finished a chapter book. We said our prayers. I sang songs. He pushed closer to me, his body a little "c" and mine the big "C" around his. The room went silent until I kissed him goodnight and he whispered, "Happy Mother's Day, Mommy. I love you!" It sounded very awake, but in a few minutes, I could sense an ease fall across our whole apartment that tells me he is finally asleep. He was.

I became a mother for this one child. With him, I've learned I am more centered and assured and steady than I am with anyone else. For him, I am always trying to be healthier, sleep more, work harder, give more, get calmer, be funnier. Because of him, I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I was not a mother. He pushes me to the edge of my patience, he has made me truly appreciate a potty joke, he has curbed my swearing by yelling out, "MOMMY! BAD WORD! QUARTER IN THE JAR!"  He has shown me how many times in one day the words "put your underwear back on" and "no. more. treats" and just plain "no" can be said, and in how many anger-diffusing accents.

So I will take this day, lovely and lazy, boundary-pushing and beautiful, time out-threatening and lip-synching, teary and with extra treats, quiet and hilarious, in bloom and still budding, simple and sweet. I will take it in all those complicated, predictable, dichotomous ways because that's exactly what mothering -- and being a mom to him -- has been so far.

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