Into the universe: Four words for my friend Matt

I celebrated the spring equinox in a yoga studio filled with other women. I was tired and excited to go out for a fun dinner later that night, but I knew I needed to be there.  My yoga teacher, a woman I adore and consider to be one of the people I was meant to meet on this planet, moved her practice to the suburbs last year and now I only see her during solstice and equinox workshops like this one. She has this gift, not just for breathing and stretching and letting the Sanskrit flow like poetry, but for intuitively reading what her students need. She doesn't do magic, but what happens in there sometimes has an air of meant-to-be-it-ness. And I love it.

I sat on my mat, palms open to the sky, deeply inhaling and exhaling as we chanted to Ganesha. In a pause, my teacher told us about the vibrational quality of mantras and how they heal. She told us she met a woman at a retreat recently and her mantra stuck with my teacher.

Only love is real.

That's what the woman told herself -- and the universe -- many times a day.

Only love is real.

That mantra almost knocked me over. Except that I was already grounded, spine straight and shoulders soft. Legs crossed and eyes closed. It almost knocked me over, but instead, it seeped in and filled up all those empty, anxious places where the worries have been echoing for too long.

I felt those new words do what my teacher said they would -- vibrate inside of me.

Only love is real.

It was powerful. And calming. It was a relief. These were the words I was waiting for, the ones I think I needed to find me.

Today, I am sitting cross-legged once again. My palms are turned down, tapping away at my laptop and texting furiously on my phone and typing terribly on my Blackberry. It is quiet here but less calm. And still, those words are bouncing off of everything around me.

Today is a big day for a blogger I feel honored to call my friend. Today, Matt Logelin's little girl turns one and he celebrates the anniversary of parenting this precious little blond baby with the big eyes and sweet smile. Tomorrow will mark one year since his wife Liz died.

Liz, who I guess many of us feel we know just like we feel we have the right to call Matt our friend after reading his prolific blog and paging through so many intimate photos of he and Maddy, left this world but certainly did not leave her husband and child behind. Matt stands, camera and daughter in hand, even when it is tough. Even when it is confusing. Even when it is hard. There he is, there they are.

When I thought of Matt and Madeline today, the mantra immediately came to mind. 

Only love is real.

I don't know what those words might mean to him...or them. But I am sending them off from my office to his corner of the world, bouncing all of the thoughts I have of hope and peace and calm and reassurance his way.

There's a lot that happens in this life. And who knows? Maybe more to come in the next. There's a lot that is stirred up in days like these, if not for us, then for people we call our friends.

And today, I hope that is all muted, even if just for a moment, by the sound of this mantra.

Only love is real.

Won't you please keep the energy moving and stop by and give Matt and Madeline some of your own real love today and tomorrow? It will be felt. I am sure of that.

Click to read more ...

This is what spoonerism should mean

I won't sugar-coat it: Lil E was hesitant to play with new kids.

And really, the kids weren't new. They are children in his class he's known for months. He just hasn't played with them in the way he's played with the boy buddies who know Star Wars like he does (now), love Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles with the passion he has (today) and don't understand why missiles that aim bats at The Riddler count as off-limit weapon play (sigh). He doesn't know them as well and he still regularly recites their full names and reports in on the news they share with the class and if they are allergic to nuts. But that didn't make him less hesitant.

Click to read more ...

This year, he can actually pedal

Here's a peek at our Sunday afternoon bike ride from our neighboorhood into my parents' neighborhood a few blocks away. Lil E is thrilled that he can maneuver his bike and work the pedals these days, and it is so fun to watch him fly down the street, getting hung up only on the big cracks in the sidewalk. I wish I could capture those bitty legs working so hard and the concentration, glee and then dreaminess cross his face as we pass block by block.

Click to read more ...