We're breaking out of our own zoo: Madagascar Live

Several days a week, after homework and snacks and catching up on the day, while frantically finish up work and before I spend no more than 17 minutes throwing together some kind of high-fructose-free dinner for Lil E and me, you will hear the snarky "WHAT.EVS" and shrill laughter and same dialogue I have heard more times than my own name coming from our television. Why? Because, for a half-hour on those days,"iCarly" has invaded our home and taken over my small child's brain. How will you recognize these are THOSE thirty minutes of hell if you are a parent already immune to those telltale sounds of terrible children's networking? By the perma-eyeroll affixed to my face.

But, damn, it makes him happy. And laugh. And learn words like "idiot" and "dating" and "pizza tacos."

What makes us both happy are those shows that we both can agree on. There aren't many. "Phinneus & Ferb" is the clear animated winner. "DIrty Jobs" makes both mama (rrrr) and kiddo (ewwww) happy. Then, there's the one Lil E STILL, five years after he first heard it, believes is really truly sincerely called "America's HOME Funniest Videos." And, of course, there's The Penguins (capitalization so necessary).

I saw every single "Penguins of Madagascar" that lives onDemand at least three times before I saw the movie "Madagascar." That was key. The sarcasm, the references to classic novels and gangsta rap, the 23 perfectly timed minutes of laughter that it took my coffee to kick in on Saturday mornings -- all very necessary for me to be prepped to watch the movie I once STRONGLY suggested would be totally awesome to see with Daddy.

By the time I was ready, Lil E knew all the dialogue. I actually had to beg him to see it, even make it seem like he was participating in some altruistic Movie Education of Mommy project. He bought it. The plea, that is. I had to pony up for the movie. (Note to self: Up allowance so there are enough quarters in the kid's jar to pitch in for exorbitant onDemand kid's movie prices.)

I laughed. The out-loud kind. I even danced to the damn "Move It, Move It" musical mindworm. I loved it.

So when I read that the whole sha-bang was going to be performed on stage, right here in my city, I felt like we had to go. I mean, it's clearly critical for my development of post-Bambi animated cinema appreciation. Plus, I've been reassured there's dancing to that one song (shhhh) in the aisles.

And if he asks, I'll say this show was for him so I'm sure not to pay back any debts when the "iCarly" crew's live show comes to town.

We were kindly given complimentary tickets to this show. But I wouldn't list it here if I didn't think it was a great fit for many of you with kids or weird obsessions with stage shows.  Tonight is opening night! Shows continue through this weekend in Chicago and in other cities.For more information about “MADAGASCAR LIVE,” visit www.madlive.com. Find “MADAGASCAR LIVE” on Facebook by visiting this Facebook page. Tickets, which start at $20, are available on www.ticketmaster.com.

Please be assured, I will always give honest, accurate reviews and will never be paid for a positive opinion. Y'all are way too savvy and valuable for that business.

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Someone Else's Words Wednesday: Because I'm listening for love, too

Midnight
Stranded at a standstill by the streetlight
Wrestled it around and it just ain’t right
And nowhere are our angels to be found

Well it’s so deep,
Been round 1000 times and still you can’t sleep
You’re buzzing like a hive and it’s a big leap
To anything that feels like solid ground

It’s a big big wall but I’m gonna tear it down.
It’s a big big wall and I’m gonna tear it down.

It reminds me
Of nights that I spent hiding in the bindweed
Wondering if anyone would find me
Lying there afraid to make a sound

It’s a big big wall but I’m gonna tear it down.
It’s a big big wall and I’m gonna tear it down.

It’s only love it’s only love, you know it’s only love & everything
It’s only love it’s only love,

it’s only everything

` Lyrics by Kris Delmhorst, "Love & Everything," and with thanks to one of my fave single mamas, Kristi, for intuiting and insisting that I listen to it today. After too many 2 a.m. nights this month, I needed that. So happy she felt that.

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Integrity redux

It was in between Tae Kwon Do class on Saturday and a playdate with a fellow Lego-lovin' Star Wars shawty that Lil E asked if I knew what the word integrity means.

I did. I mean, I do. Plus, I was already aware of his misconception of the word. Clearly, I could not answer outright.

"Hmmm. You tell me what it means," I said, employing that tactic parents generations back have used on kids who know exactly what they're being lured in to pretty much from the womb on. It's a strategy to see where your kids stands on multiplication tables, French vocabulary, what Eminem lyrics really mean, the Tooth Fairy and whether homework has been done.

Or in this case, where the piles of toys end up.

"It means," he said all official-like, "that you DON'T just put your toys in a pile underneath your bed when your mommy tells you to put them away."

The definition was different than the one his buddy's mom texted me. But for this six-year old, it was dead on.The real truth, though, came in the look that followed.

It was the "no, no, no...I've got this one" look -- raised eyebrow, smug smile, that pause when the onlooker is convinced a little condescending wink will follow but then PADOW! in the final milliseconds, the most innocent, ear-to-ear award-winning grin. You know those smiles, the ones that get auditioning kids cereal commercials and get small children on to viral videos when they've done some major damage to a house or baby sister with Mommy's favorite MAC lipstick and the only object of discernible monetary value in the whole house. It was one of those.

It was, I only know now because I've falled in for it a gazillion times already, to tell me he'd never, ever cheat when he was supposed to be putting toys away. Noooooo. Not him. Not my boy. I mean, look at that smile.

Oh no, my child had the right answer. According to that almost-persuasive and well-practiced look, he also has oodles of integrity. And he also still has a ton of crap shoved under his bed.

This time, I checked. The definition and the bed.

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